We hear the sloka ‘anyabhilasita sunyam,’ and we can very critically look into our hearts and consider, “What am I doing? Am I trying to serve Krsna in the way my mind likes to serve Him?” It is a subtle difference, because the mind is very tricky. If we fail to distinguish between these feelings, then anyabhilasita, material desires, will cover our bhakti, and there will be no way we can advance. Today, about 99% of the devotees are like this. Some do it willfully, and some fail to distinguish the difference. If Gurudeva asks them to do something which is not pleasing to their own mind, they get angry or annoyed with him. We have to very carefully observe this and try to kick out this anyabhilasita.
Bhakti is not so cheap. We are trying to attain that love which controls both Srimati Radhika and Krsna, but we must understand what price we have to pay for this. We have to give up everything we consider to belong to us. We do not have any separate existence of our own. The feeling of unconditional, unalloyed surrender is so deep that we become one with the mood of Gurudeva. Then, within our hearts, all the aspirations are no longer our aspirations. They are Gurudeva’s aspirations, or those of Hari, Guru and Vaisnava. This is the state we want to achieve, and unless we attain it, there is no way to advance in bhakti.
April 12, 2000 Mathurā